In the nearly 4 months since I quit Facebook, I find that I maintain a much healthier equilibrium.
Elections are swirling around us here in Mississippi at the state and local level, and before we know it, another presidential cycle will be upon us as well.
That is reason alone to stay away from Facebook, if not for the personal peace I have also come to enjoy from its absence in my life.
I don’t follow my stats on this blog like I used to, but in glancing at them this week, it would appear that I’m on par to maybe match what I had last year, which was a personal record. So it would seem that my departure from public posting among my “friends” has not hurt my readership here at A Pensieve View.
I choose my news sources carefully, mostly online AP articles with the occasional mainstream drivel thrown into the mix.
I pared my Instagram down when I got off of Facebook and I only look at Twitter occasionally.
My “virtual” connections have become very selective, and I’m quite happy about it.
It would seem as though I’m finding my sweet spot of introvertedness.
My “me time” has been non-existent, as of late. This time last year I was making regular appointments with myself for alone time, taking in movies or shopping trips. I need to get that going again. But, for now, I’m content to take the occasional solitary lunch break, go to bed early for 30 – 45 minutes of solitude before sleep, and my mornings.
I love to start my days early. Not rushed. A few moments outside before the heat bears down like an angry villager with pitchforks and a torch known as the sun.
The only thing I’d change about my mornings would be the neighbors cattle, which SCREECH their calls across the pasture and chomp on the grass like un-mannered toddlers while I attempt to enjoy my cup of morning joe.
I feel as though I’m in a place of rebuilding. The departure from Facebook coincided with the deep depression that accompanied the onset of my hypothyroidism. I’m long absent from church, from regular time with certain friends, and have yet to find a way to not feel like I’m neglecting my mother, who is the sole caretaker of my grandmother.
So there’s much more work to do.
I’m trying to eat better. Drink more water. And find the ever-elusive balance between work, family, and life.
The start of a new school year always kind of set me up for a schedule to start constructing, but with the beginning of a new adventure there, that has yet to be determined.
So I’m simply taking one day at a time, and trying to stay a tiny bit ahead of the business at hand.
But I’m calmer. Less anxious than maybe…..well, in a long time.
I credit my meds. My social media absence. And the day to day routine that keeps me centered.
But also my selectiveness. I’m learning how to not feel obliged to be all things to all people. How to let them feel their moods and respond to their demands within my own limitations, without guilt.
I’m not in a place of this kind of inner peace often, unfortunately. But I think I’m learning how. And that’s not nothing.