I got no inspiration.
Sometimes you have to go looking for it. Sometimes it will come naturally. Sometimes you just have to start writing something, anything, and inspiration will come.
And sometimes, none of that works at all.
I’ve attempted several posts this week. They all sound ridiculous. Like half-finished thoughts.
I blame some nights of erratic sleep. Withdrawals from some things. The depression that lingers. But it’s getting better – all of that. Slowly. With baby steps, therapy, discipline, focus.
And unfortunately, that last part is the problem. I feel like I have just enough focus right now to work, do what I need to do as a parent, and keep away from things that are unhealthy. That’s all. That’s my limit. If I try to do anything else right now I feel like I’ll simply deflate.
It’s still one day at a time for me right now. It always is, but it’s especially that way in my present situation.
I learned about Brain Inflammation last week at therapy. And I really feel a lot better about my own now that I know the stress I experience can make my brain inflamed, just like it can inflame other organs in the body.
If you were hoping for happier posts, or a top 10, or something inspirational, I’m sorry. I’m just not there yet. I don’t feel a dark cloud looming over me right now. I do feel a crisp, cool, light. And that is a trigger for me. One that I’ll explain another day.
For now, I’m just writing to write so I don’t forget. So I don’t quit. So I keep some momentum, however tiny.